Archive for deliveries
>Almost dinner time.
>
If I do all the things behind the computer that I want to do, and I don’t mean just farting around, I can easily spend a whole afternoon and still not be done. Not because I’m slow, but because there’s so much to do and it all takes time, which I don’t mind, but it’s time taken away from doing other necessary things.
I tell you, though, there’s nothing better than coming home from therapy and walking the dog and turning on the computer for a nice long session. Today I allowed myself that time. I made an executive decision. Especially when I checked the shelves and the refrigerator and saw that I do not have to go to the store for at least another two days.
I very moodily got out of bed this morning when the alarm clock went off, because I thought it was way too early, but then I saw that cute face of Jesker who wanted to be petted and I had my coffee and cigarette and I felt a lot better. So, I took my time to become a fully functioning human being again and then got up to properly start the day. Once I get going, I’m okay. I move like a train, albeit an early locomotive, not a high speed one.
Today I had creative therapy, but I got there early enough to hang out in the stinking smoker’s room with a very depressed woman who wished she was home in bed and looked it too. I wanted to cheer her up, but didn’t know the words, not being depressed myself anymore to that point and only having vague memories of what that was like. It’s like childbirth, you forget how awful it was.
Soon enough it was time to go down to the studio and go to work on my attempt at a sculpture. I’m calling it an attempt, because as I worked on it, it became clear to me that the design didn’t lend itself well to the clay and that the whole thing was likely to collapse upon itself, and sure enough, pretty soon I reached that point. Do not despair. I folded the whole thing over and took the rest of the clay and pounded it all back into a solid block and started over again to redo the sculpture that came out of the oven in fifteen pieces. I do want that one and I want to give it one more try.
As I’m building it up, I’m trying not to make any mistakes in it and avoid getting any air trapped in it, because I think that’s what happened before. I’m paying close attention to what the therapist tells me and follow the instructions.
I’m always covered in white clay dust by the time I’m ready to go home and try to get most of it off me and the rest gets blown off as I ride my bicycle home. Sometimes I still have some on my boots when I get home and I forget about it and walk around with it all day long. That shows you how much attention I don’t pay to my appearance sometimes. I can be vain at the start of the day and then forget about it for the rest of the day.
In the meantime, I’m trying to figure out how deaf Jesker is. I try to get his attention when he is not looking at me and I just start talking to him. So far he doesn’t seem to hear me much, or he is ignoring me, but then that would be something new. He’s always been very alert and now he seems to use his sight more. He has also been sleeping behind the front door when I am gone, so he knows immediately when I am home.
Anyway, I noticed that he watches me more closely now to see what I am going to do and when I go to bed at night, while he’s asleep on his blanket, he searches the whole apartment for me when he wakes up, while I call his name from the bedroom.
Tomorrow I have creative therapy again, this time in the different room with the different therapist. I’ll finish my third and last doodle and I’ll try to remember to take pictures. Then I am going to be doing some painting. There is a whole collection of art postcards to choose from in all diferent styles to copy and I think I’ll have a go at that. Unless I change my mind between now and tomorrow when the moment is there,
Alors, it’s time to put my pajamas on and get comfortable. I’m starting to yawn, but it’s to early for that. This old body wants to just sleep more and more. I wish I had a soft ice cream. That would taste so good right now, But alas.
I hope you all had a good day and that you will have a splendid night. We are supposed to have rain. It’s cozy when it rains and you’re laying in bed.
Ciao…
>Full of Joy.
>I just checked my banking account with a certain amount of trepidation in my heart and the tiniest amount of unwillingness to face the dire truth, but oh, my heart is full of joy, because the tax people have, without telling me, deposited 4 months worth of health subsidy in my account and now I am better off than I thought I was. Oh, hurray, I said a little ‘thank you, Lord’ when I saw that, and I’m not really religious. At least I am not when I am supposed to be normal. I forgot all about getting that money and it is going to make such a huge difference in how I get through the month.
Well, every cloud has a silver lining and I think my clouds usually have one. I must never complain too loudly, because so far, there has always been a solution, even when it has not been the most elegant one. I am still living, breathing, eating, sleeping under a roof and having normal days without fear of disaster. That’s something anyway. There are a lot of people who don’t have that.
This morning, after I had been up for a few hours, I decided I was still sleepy and went back to bed and fell sound asleep until the doorbell rang and the Überhund started to bark his head off. It was a delivery man with a package for me and I asked him, quite befuddled, why he was delivering packages on Sunday. He looked at me very surprised and told me that it was Tuesday today. I felt like I was in the Twilight Zone and completely discombobulated.
Very quickly I went and made myself a strong cup of coffee and smoked a cigarette as deeply as I could and saw that it was time to take the Überhund for a walk, but I was walking around in my pajamas with a sweater on top and socks on and I had a wrinkle in my face from the pillow.
So, first I had to make the transformation into the hip chick that I am when I go outside and I tried to wash the wrinkle out of my face with cold water. I only half succeeded and applied make up and disarranged my hair until it looked floppy and tousled enough, and hair sprayed it, resulting in sneezes from the Überhund. He does insist on watching the process.
When I was dressed properly, I was also quite awake and, even though I really needed more coffee, I bravely stepped outside the door with the Überhund at my side, from which point he proceeded to try and drag me through the neighborhood to all the best places to look for scraps of food, because it had been trash day and he thinks there are edible items in every bush and under every leaf in every gutter. Try and pull 45 lbs of dog in the direction you want to go in.
I finally resorted to getting very angry and scolding him, which helped for the rest of the walk. It helped so well, that he got a reward as usual when we got home and he did ask for it very nicely.
I ordered a fluffy sheepskin with a rubberized backing for him to use in the living room and I think I will put it under the coffee table, because when he is not with me, he seems to like laying there the best. I hope he will like it, but it was not very expensive and I am sure the cats will like it a lot. There may even be arguments about it. I am sure that Gandhi will claim her corner of it and the Überhund will grudgingly allow it.
I am still very pleased with my hair and send admiring glances at myself whenever I pass a mirror. Oh yes, I think, there she is with that new hair color and that really cool hairdo. I think I really forget that I am 54 years old and that I am now having a revival of my youth and am indulging in it in a grand way. I am so happy that I don’t have to dress my age and wear nylons and corsets, although a corset does do great things for your figure. It’s just the constraint I would dislike. Like being harnessed in and not having any breathing space when bending over. It’s no wonder there used to be so many swooning women.
Autumn is definitely upon us now, there is no denying the fact any longer. There is a chill in the air and a crispness that makes the leaves change color. Already some come tumbling down. It will be quite a spectacle as usual and it will be my first autumn as a single woman and I want to specifically be aware of that and really taste the season very consciously and let all the changes not go by unnoticed.
For some reason it is very significant to me. Maybe because in the past years I have gotten depressed around this time of year and I have made up my mind that I am specifically not going to have that happen now, but look forward to it with a new found curiosity. It will be a time to walk around downtown and sit on the café terraces and watch the people go by and take pictures with my new camera in the chill of the afternoon sun.
You see how I have this all planned and I can actually envision myself doing this in my mind. I do need to pump up my bicycle tires before I go and do that. Remember the last time I tried that? Lesson well learned. Those cobblestones downtown are hard on your tires and push out the air with every bump.
Well, now it’s time too have something to eat, because it is that time of day and it is inevitable that I eat, it is a stumbling block in the proceedings, that hunger feeling. I would rather not have it at all, but I suppose I would forget to eat all together and become a little skeleton woman. Ha, that will be the day!
Have a super one, everybody. I think it’s raining in Greece.
Ciao…
Another Splendid Day 