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Sunshine after rain…

June 22, 2011 at 7:14 pm · Filed under buddhism, early evening, rain, summer solstice, summer time, sunshine, television, the animals, the dog, thrillers, walks, weather

Finally, after it has rained all day long, the sun has come out and it is very nicely shining on the whole neighborhood and through the living room windows. I can tell you that it’s very welcome after that very long, non stop shower that lasted all day. Not that it wasn’t cozy inside, but it was very difficult to walk the dog in. That’s why I just took him out and although there was a stiff breeze, we dawdled in the sunshine and took our time getting back.

I’m glad that it is evening now and that I can relax and put my pajamas on in a little while. The most comfortable thing to do is to sit in my bathrobe in front of the TV in the evening. Especially today and the whole month after it, since there are going to be thrillers on every evening. My happiness knows no bounds. We are starting with an episode of the series ‘Case Sensitive’ tonight. I’ve never seen it so it will be a whole new experience for me. I suppose that’s a nice benefit of the summer TV season.

It’s officially summer now, but it doesn’t feel like it. It feels more like autumn outside. I wonder if this is the shape of things to come. Actually, temperature wise I don’t mind it too much. I like this better than when it’s too hot outside. I much prefer this cooler weather to a heatwave. I prefer wearing layers of clothes to hardly wearing any at all.

It’s already been the longest day of the year. I went to bed at night as if it was just an ordinary day like any other. I didn’t notice anything different about the day, the heavens didn’t move. I’m not a very good pagan. I probably should have worshiped the sun or something, except that there were too many clouds in the sky to do that properly. Besides, I’m more of a Buddhist anyway and I don’t think they’re much into sun worship.

I’ve got to eat some dinner and take care of the animals. I think their bowls need to be refilled and they need some cuddling.

Have a good evening.

Ciao,

Nora

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Reinventing life…

June 18, 2011 at 5:51 pm · Filed under coffee, end of the day, rain, state of mind, television, the cat, the dog, the weekend, Uncategorized, walks, weather

I’m drinking some delicious coffee to celebrate the fact that it’s the end of the afternoon again. It means that I made it through another day successfully. When it gets to be this time of the day, I figure the hardest part is over and I can rest on my laurels. What comes after this is easy. It just involves eating dinner and walking the dog and putting on my pajamas and bathrobe. Those are things that hardly faze me. Although I do have to say that in this state of mind, waking the dog is harder. I mustn’t think about that too much ahead of time.

First I’ll enjoy my coffee and the time I’m sitting here writing this. I really have to try and stay in the moment and not project myself into what’s to come too much. There’s enough time for that. I’m usually pretty good about staying in the moment. I can focus on what’s going on right now and not worry about what is about to happen. I can be in total denial if I have to be, although I don’t think I’m supposed to take it to that extend.

The dog and the cat are lying side by side on the dining table in front of the window. They are both sound asleep and are absorbing the sunlight, but already the next rainclouds are moving in. We’ve had rain on and off all day and wind too. It’s been autumn like weather. I felt like closing all the windows and turning the heater on, but it’s really not been cold enough. There would not have been an excuse for it. It would be more sensible to put on a cardigan and another pair of socks.

I kept thinking, all day long, that today was Sunday and that I had to put the trash out tonight. I’m glad it’s only Saturday because I do appreciate the days off. I don’t want the weekend to go by quickly at all. I’m even thinking about staying up late tonight to watch some television programs that I usually don’t get around to. It doesn’t matter what time I get up tomorrow morning. If I’m not mistaken, Taggart is on late tonight, although the programming may have changed because we’re in the summer season now. I’ll have to look up a TV guide on line in a while.

I’ve got to walk the dog. He’s impatiently waiting beside me. I hope there’s no cloudburst when we’re out there.

Have a good evening.

Ciao,

Nora

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Clouds and sleep…

June 15, 2011 at 5:48 pm · Filed under armchair, cheese, craving, early morning, fruit juice, nap, personal helper, schedule, the alarm clock, the cat, the dog, the fields, weather

I had to get up early this morning because my personal helper was going to be here at 9 am. As a result, I am two hours ahead of my schedule in everything. I’m trying to slow myself down as much as possible in order for time to catch up with me again, but I’ve not been successful yet. I’m going to write this post as slowly as I can and maybe that will do the job.

I’ve already taken my afternoon nap and very pleasant it was too. It was necessary that I took it for having gotten up so early. I’m not used to that, being wakened by the alarm clock. It’s definitely not my preferred way of waking up. I had to sit in my armchair and have several cups of coffee before I could even think about facing anybody. I do need my quiet moments when I first get up.

I do allow the dog to sit on my lap. I don’t have to have any complicated conversations with him. All I have to do is pet him. He and the cat are the easiest company first thing in the morning. They don’t make many demands on me. They are just happy that I’m up and that I make sure there’s food in their bowls. That’s not a very difficult task. And the cat wants her dish of milk and the dog wants fresh water. That’s easily done when I’m in the kitchen getting coffee.

We’re alternately having sun and then clouds in the way. When the sun comes out, the world is brilliant and much more cheerful. We didn’t get any rain out of all of those clouds today, but we may get some tonight. I haven’t needed to wear a jacket or a cardigan when I’ve walked the dog. The temperature is very pleasant, even though there’s a bit of a breeze. You can tell that the rain that we’ve had has done nature a lot of good. The grass in the fields is a lot greener and there are even mushrooms growing. I don’t know if they are edible. I’m not going to try and find out.

I’m having a tall glass of orange juice and the Exfactor was smart enough to get me the mild kind. That’s going to be much easier on my stomach because it’s less acid and tastes like it too. I really do prefer this kind. I don’t know how they make it less acid, but I appreciate it very much. I do have have to get my vitamin C in, after all, and I don’t know a better way. It’s very refreshing to drink.

Last night I had a craving for something hearty and luckily remembered that I still had some cheese in the refrigerator on the top shelf. It had been there for a long time, but it was still good. It had nothing fuzzy growing on it anyway. I ate as much as I could stand and was over my craving and I have enough left for future attacks. It’s wrapped up very well. It’s very nice when you discover the very food that you have a craving for in your refrigerator.

The dog wants to go for a walk so I have to end this epistle. He does seem to be in a hurry. He may just be bored, of course.

I hope you’re all having a nice day with good weather.

Ciao,

Nora

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Sunday morning…

June 12, 2011 at 5:51 am · Filed under bathrobe, bedtime, birds, coffee, daughters, holidays, milk, Sunday, the dog, the neighborhood, weather

The early birds are singing joyfully as if they know it’s going to be a very good day. It will be as far as the weather is concerned anyway. We are getting a respite from the rain and are going to have a sunny day today. I’m sure it will be a good day overall because it is Sunday and what can go wrong on a Sunday? It’s the one day of the week that’s guaranteed to be uneventful. I haven’t had a Sunday yet that was not.

It’s Pentecost today, so officially a holiday besides it being a Sunday. Tomorrow will be Pentecost Monday and another day off. I’m looking forward to that.

I would have been asleep still if the dog hadn’t started barking. That is a bad habit he has sometimes. I don’t enjoy being wakened out of a sound sleep and having to get up to settle him down. The problem is that I’m wide awake when I do and there’s no chance of me going back to sleep right away.

I’ve had my cup and a half of coffee and have switched to cold milk. It tastes so good. I am inhaling it. It is making me feel kind of cold and I’ve had to put on my bathrobe. I got this bathrobe from my daughter three and a half years ago and it has served me well ever since. It’s especially good now because it’s gotten so big on me. I can really wrap it around myself well and tie it tight with the belt. I’m always nice and warm in it.

The milk is giving me the settled stomach and the energy I need. It really makes me feel good. I can always count on milk to do that for me. A few glasses of milk set me right. I would miss it more than coffee if I had to choose.

It’s become morning now and I have to think about going back to bed. I definitely need some more sleep. The great thing about Sundays is that I can sleep late without feeling guilty. It’s assumed that everybody does and that nobody will disturb you. This neighborhood is very quiet on a Sunday. Even kids don’t show themselves until some time in the afternoon.

I hope you all have a great day.

Ciao,

Nora

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In the magic zone…

May 31, 2011 at 2:19 am · Filed under appointments, bicycle, chores, clothes, coffee, middle of the night, politics, self image, the dog, the Exfactor, weather

I was smart tonight and made myself a proper pot of coffee right away instead of messing around with the heated up stuff. I knew I was going to like a freshly brewed cup of coffee ever so much better, so that’s what I’ve got. I was patient enough to wait the extra few minutes for it and to put in the little bit of work to make it. The reward speaks for itself. I’m drinking it now and it tastes very good. It’ beats what comes from the microwave by far. I doubt I’ll make that mistake again. I poured the old coffee down the drain where it belonged.

It goes to show you that you can teach old dogs new tricks. I’m never too old to learn, especially when it comes to matters of good taste. I don’t have to be so niggardly that I have to reheat old coffee, no matter how convenient it is. A person does have to draw the line somewhere. I guess that’s where I draw the line. I must always consider myself worthy of a freshly brewed cup of coffee, unless we end up in the crisis years and we are not there yet. Though if it were up to my government, we shortly would be.

I’m sitting here in the middle of the night after I’ve already slept a couple of hours. It is always my intention to sleep through the night, but I know I will never make it. I always have to go to the toilet and let the dog out back. Those are always good enough reasons for me to stay up and turn on the computer for a few hours. It’s a habit that is hard to break and it has rusted into place.

I’m not going to claim that I do my best thinking at night anymore because I don’t think it is true. I think I do as well during the day after I’ve woken up from my afternoon nap. Some sleep beforehand seems to be involved, though.

I pumped up the flat tire of my bicycle the other day and rode it to the tobacconist, but it was obvious that it was not okay. There was a bump in it and the bike rode funnily. I made it over there and back, but by the next day the tire was completely flat again. There’s obviously something in the tire. A piece off glass or something.

The Exfactor is coming over today to do the groceries and fix the tire. He knows how to do such things. He is very handy with them. As a well established Dutch woman, I should know how to do this myself, but so far I’m unable to and unwilling to learn. I would rather go to the bike repair shop than fix a tire. I would get completely frustrated. Mostly I just have to avoid sharp things that lie on the road. Or get indestructible tires. I don’t need my bike this week, so I’m in no real hurry to get it fixed, but the Exfactor does it quickly. He’s a real pro at it.

I have no appointments all week and I’m happy for it. It’s going to be a bit of a vacation week. I will have lots of time to arrange my life as I see fit and do things the way I like them according to my own schedule. That’s such a relief. I like being in charge of my own time. I will not waste it and get my chores done, but I will do them in my own sweet time.

There’s no pressure if I don’t have to be somewhere at a certain time on a certain day. Appointments have a tendency to loom big on the horizon and mess up my day. I prefer not having any at all, even though they are a bit of an outing. I suppose if I were hardly ever to have any, I would appreciate them more. Sometimes, only having to go out to walk the dog is more than enough.That is still enough reason to get dressed properly.

Yesterday was by exception a very nice day. We had sunshine and the temperature was 26C. Today it is going to be cloudy and cold and I will have to dress accordingly. Yesterday I was skimpily dressed with bare arms. I do have a bit of a tan with freckles. Little by little you pick up some color just from being outside. My legs, though, are as white as ever. They don’t match the rest of me. Today it is only going to be 16C, so that is quite a difference. Rain is predicted, but as usual we will probably not see any.We’re dealing with a drought situation.

Last night a single bird sang very cheerfully after 10 o’clock. It was as if he wanted to say goodnight. That’s’ when it had properly gotten dark. I fell asleep shortly after that.

I hope you’re all having a good night. For those of you still up, have a good evening.

Ciao,

Nora

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In the middle of the night…

May 28, 2011 at 4:12 am · Filed under a long night, bed, bedtime, cigarettes, coffee, confessional, domestic help, Friday, gardens, laundry, middle of the night, nap, sisters, the dog, the Exfactor, walks, weather, weekends

You can be your most creative self, providing you have numerous cups of coffee and your cigarettes. Those are very necessary requisites. I wouldn’t know what to do without them. I don’t think I would be able to think straight if I didn’t have them at hand. Of course, that’s because of the physical dependency on these substances and if I tried very hard, I could possibly do without them. I would have to move to a deserted island, though, and be forsaken of them. Maybe my brain would then learn how to be creative all on its own without stimulants.

I’m not to the point yet where I’m ready to quit. I’m too much of a coward and unwilling to go through the horrors of withdrawal symptoms. I’ve tried that before and it wasn’t pretty. I have to find a good way of quitting first before I’ll try it again. I do think about it regularly and I know I’m going to try to quit again. But I want to do it right and not make a halfhearted attempt.

How’s that for a confession? It helps to be up in the middle of the night to think clearly. At least in my case it does. I’m always most clear when everybody else is asleep. It’s when I’m most able to formulate my thoughts, or so I tell myself. It’s very possible that I’m capable of this during the day also, but just don’t try it. Actually, I think I do okay after I’ve taken my afternoon nap. Maybe I’m most able after I’ve slept for a while like I have now.

I’m sitting here in my warm gray cardigan with my socks on. I decided that I was a little cold. I do have the bedroom windows open and it’s a little chilly outside, but I like it. The cold air feels good. I would like for it to rain now and I would love to hear the sound of a good rain storm, but we have not been so fortunate. No rain has fallen, even though it was promised. Everything is just as dry as it was.

Yesterday was an alright sort of day. Because it was Friday, I enjoyed it simply for the day it was. The day before the weekend. The domestic help came and cleaned the apartment and was done in the shortest amount of time, leaving me lots of of time and space to myself to enjoy it. The Exfactor also came by briefly for a cup of coffee and brought washing powder and cat food from the store he shops at. They are good brands that are cheaper than what we can get at my supermarket. You have to make every penny count.

The laundry is drying in the bathroom, making the whole apartment smell good. I didn’t want to hang it outside because of the promised rain. I put clean sheets on the bed again and enjoyed going to sleep between them last night. It’s always a pleasure to sleep between freshly laundered sheets. I just wish I could manage to stay asleep between them and not have the urge to get up in the middle of the night. At least I do know that I have enough duvet covers. There’s no shortage of them and now that I’ve got a new thicker pillow on my bed, I no longer need four pillow cases all at once for all the pillows.

My sister is in Italy this weekend, so I won’t be going over there on Sunday. It won’t be nice enough weather to sit in the garden anyway. I have to amuse myself some other way these coming days. Doubtlessly I’ll manage that. There’s always the dog to take for long walks and to check out other people’s gardens.

I think I will get myself back to bed now. It is early in the morning and time to sleep some more. It will be with much joy that I crawl under the duvet again.

Have a good weekend.

Ciao,

Nora

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>Those rotten chores…

May 26, 2011 at 2:56 pm · Filed under books, chores, dishes, end of the day, finances, laundry, nervous breakdown, paperwork, sports, stress, television, the dog, walks, weather, writing

I’ve done my chores and the washing machine is churning away so I don’t have to feel bad about sitting here and taking the time to write this. I’ve even done my administration and ordered new food for the dog on line. Yes, I have done my duties and didn’t have a nervous breakdown.

I only was in danger of having one for half a minute and then I dared it to. I faced it head on and decided it wasn’t going to get to me. That I was stronger than it and that I was not in need of a tranquilizer simply because I had a number of stressful activities to take care of.

I proved to be right. Opening the mail and facing possible bad news was not half as bad as I thought it was going to be. It was what it was, unpleasant. They wanted my money. I dislike that intensely, but it doesn’t help if I have a breakdown over it.

In my spare moments I watched tennis at Roland Garros. There were some Dutch people playing and they needed my attention, not that it helped. We don’t do all that great, not when faced with formidable opponents like Kim Klijsters and Marty Fish. It was fun to watch anyway and they were nice moments to have a cup of coffee and a cigarette.

I couldn’t finish watching any of the matches, so I don’t know how they ended. I had to do my chores and walk the dog in the windy day. There are rain clouds, but no rain has fallen out of them yet.

The dog had been stealing the potholders off their hook in the kitchen and playing with them. They had drool all over them and they’re in the washing machine now. He has also been stealing the magnetic little animals off the refrigerator and I found them throughout the apartment. I put them up high, but he still got to them.

It’s a completely new activity for him that he’s just discovered. Stealing things from the kitchen. I suppose that up till now, it was just a place to go eat and he hadn’t really explored it properly. I guess next will be the dishtowels. I’ve got to go to the pet shop and buy him some new indestructible toys. He wrecked his rubber rabbit to the point that I had to toss it out.

He really enjoyed tearing that rabbit apart and it took him a long time. It was worth the price I paid for it. I may get one like it again. It was the best toy we’ve had so far.

I’ve got to put away the dishes and hang up the clean laundry. I’m glad the day is almost over. I have to walk the dog one more time and then I’m going to put on clean pajamas and vegetate in front of the television. I may even read my book. It will be an evening spent leisurely with the minimum amount of activity.

You wouldn’t have thought that officially this was my day off. I had no appointments today and nobody coming over.

I hope you’re all having a good day with the kind of weather you most want.

Ciao,

Nora

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>Trying to go to sleep…

May 22, 2011 at 8:10 pm · Filed under armchair, bedtime, beer, cappuccinos, clothes, coffee, food, garden, hairdo, human being, knee, schedule, sisters, sleep, the dog, walks, weather, weight loss

I’ve been on my way to bed now for a while, but I’m unsuccessful in getting there. I think I must not be properly sleepy yet, so I am foiled in my attempts. I even took my sleep medication, but it hasn’t worked one bit. I am wide awake. I am going to try again as soon as I’ve written this post because I do want to stick to some kind of normal schedule. I don’t want to upset the applecart.

I slept late this morning and had a heck of a time getting out of bed. I finally got up because my knee was hurting me. I had to straighten out my leg and that was enough motivation to get up. It took me several cups of coffee to become lucid. All I did was sit in my armchair and drink coffee and smoke cigarettes while I waited to become a functioning human being.

Actually, it didn’t take all that long. I was one within half an hour, but I like to exaggerate. I also like to drag out the waking up moment as long as I can. I’d rather not do anything right away if I can help it.

There does come a time when I can’t postpone it and I have to get dressed and walk the dog. I found some appropriate clothes to wear and set out with him in the noontime clouded sunshine. The clothes I wore were warm enough for the stiff wind that was blowing gray clouds across the sky and it looked like it was going to rain, but then it actually never did all day.

The wind blew so hard that it almost ruined my hairdo, even though I had hair sprayed it. Later on in the afternoon, when I rode my bike to my sister’s house, I got very much out of breath from pedaling into it and even worse so on the way home. It felt like I was at the sea with a good storm blowing in my face.

Luckily, in my sister’s garden we were somewhat sheltered, though it wasn’t as warm as it usually is and we couldn’t really sit out there with bare arms. We certainly didn’t get a tan because there were too many clouds covering the sun all the time. It would have been good if it had at least rained because the garden needed it, but not a drop fell from the heavens.

I had two cappuccinos and a cold beer and a piece of chocolate with nuts in it. That’s about as decadent as I could get and it did fill me up. The beer was very refreshing and I drank it with a lot of taste. It always takes a while before I can eat dinner after that and I ended up eating my soup late and sharing it with the dog. I haven’t even had dessert yet, but I figured that I didn’t need it after that piece of chocolate.

This morning I went on the bathroom scale and much to my surprise, I had lost another kilo. I wasn’t really expecting that and was thrilled about it. It motivates me to keep trying and to not grab something extra to eat when it’s not necessary. I don’t need to eat snacks really. I haven’t gotten more of those cheese crackers either and now just have the plain crackers again. They’re a lot healthier and less addictive. The cheese crackers were loaded with salt.

Well, it’s time for me to try and go to sleep now. I will start the ritual all over again. I think I’m sleepy enough this time. I’m longing for bed anyway.

I hope you’ll all have a good night or that you’re still having a good Sunday. Mine was good enough. I’m not ready for it to be Monday. Blagh!

Ciao,

Nora

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>Wildlife…

May 21, 2011 at 3:20 pm · Filed under clothes, dreams, frustrations, nap, Saturday, the cat, the dog, weather, wildlife

I woke up from my nap having dreamed that I was a very frustrated chicken because I didn’t have any hands. It was an awful feeling to only have wings and no fingers to pick things up with. I still had that feeling when I woke up and it was pretty terrible. It took a few seconds for it to dissipate.

No doubt it had to do with the fact that before I took a nap, I had to remove a dead bird from the shower stall. It had been left there by the cat and luckily, the dog had shown no interest in it whatsoever.

I had a good look at it because you don’t get to have a close look at a wild bird that often. It was intact and had no insides hanging out. It looked like it was asleep and therefor I had been a little reluctant at first to pick it up. It was just an ordinary bird for which I don’t know the English name. It was an adult and I’m surprised that the cat got a hold of it. She’s normally not that great a hunter of birds.

I threw it in the green bin and figured it will properly decompose there. I didn’t know what else to do with it either. I knew I had to keep it out of the cat’s reach. I didn’t want her to drag it back inside and demolish it and get feathers all over the place like one of my other cats did one time. That was a real mess to clean up.

I hope no chicks go hungry now that the mother bird is dead. That’s another worry. My cat’s a killer cat. I wouldn’t have thought it possible after all those mice. Maybe her skills have improved now that she’s the only cat here. Although the male cat wasn’t much of a hunter.

Anyway, being a chicken without any hands isn’t much fun and I wonder if chickens experience it as such? I hope they’re not aware of their loss and go through life oblivious of it. They can only pick and scratch. It’s like having your arms bound to your body. All you can do is hopelessly flutter when you get a little bit of room.

I’m wearing a skimpy sun dress that was too small on me when I bought it and that now fits. I have another one in a different print in the same size. I will try that one on next. Isn’t it wonderful when clothes appear in your closet that turn out to fit you? I must have closer looks in my closet more often.

It’s been a nice day with good weather. Tomorrow we may have some rain, but the temperature will be nice. I’ll believe the rain when I see it. We’ve been promised it often enough.

Have a good day all of you. Enjoy your Saturday.

Ciao,

Nora

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>On an overcast afternoon…

May 15, 2011 at 1:48 pm · Filed under caffeine, chores, coffee, earrings, frustrations, moods, nap, scarves, stubbornness, Sunday, the dog, user friendly, walks, weather

As has become routine by now, I have just woken up from a nap and am imbibing in some caffeine to get the most out of my precarious mood that I always seem to have on such occasions. I will be right as rain in the shortest amount of time, all it’s going to take is some more coffee. I know that always works, I can pretty much count on it, but I’m drinking a cup of warmed up coffee and that won’t do.

I have to make a fresh pot and open a new package of ground coffee. That’s always the frustrating part that I don’t look forward to. You’re supposed to be able to open the package without the aid of scissors and I always do my very best to achieve this, but it requires some dexterity and muscle power. I don’t want to be defeated, though, and stubbornly keep trying and not reach for the scissors that are right there in the kitchen drawer.

Eventually I do manage, but I dislike the job and wish for someone else to do it. Since there is no one else here, I have to, much to my frustration. If I were a manufacturer, I would design a user friendly package to pack my ground coffee in, although that would probably add to the price of the product. Oh well, nothing in life is free. Except frustration.

You can tell that I’m a 21st century woman because my level of frustration is very low and I like everything done very easily and conveniently. If I were a designer, I would always be looking for the most simple way to do things. The most user friendly and least frustrating way. I would want objects to cause the least amount of hassle.

I have to clean up the kitchen and hang up a load of laundry to dry. The dog destroyed a stick in the living room and I have to pick up the pieces from that. He doesn’t have opposable thumbs so he can’t do it himself. That’s his excuse anyway.

My infected earlobe is healing. It’s almost back to normal. I put Fucidin ointment on it twice a day and that helps it very much. The swelling has gone down quite a bit. I don’t think I will be wearing earrings for a while and I will be decorating myself in other ways for the coming future. I’ve been wearing lightweight scarves and they’ve done nicely. Of course, the weather has been perfect for them.

It rained just a while ago, but now it’s stopped and the dog is sitting in front of the window looking longingly outside. I think I will take him for a walk while it is dry. The sun is even out every now and then.

Have a nice Sunday.

Ciao,

Nora

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